Can I take a break?

I'm so fucked up with life recently.
I have no siblings, no so-called true friends, absolutely no one to talk to.
Therefore I choose to come to my blog, here, a lil tiny space for me to breathe.
You can skip this post coz this shit is gonna be boring and sad.Lol

Sometimes I'm so speechless with life.
I'm dealing with alot of things right now, alot, more than I could manage.
Why, why me? I would ask myself.
I'm just an ordinary teenage girl, a fifteen-years-old girl. I'm just fucking 15. 
I should be enjoying life, having my own sweet leisure time, party all night with no stress.
But what I'm going through now is definitely not what a teen should do.
God, why do you think I'm strong enough to handle all these? I'm not. 

I was still having my own sweet time shopping and everything paid by dad,
I'm still my daddy's girl, being so dependent on him,
I would called him whenever I needed money, or needed something,
I took everything as granted. He's my dad, I deserve all these.
What the fuck was wrong with me? How could such daughter think like that?
If you're thinking like the same way I did before,
trust me, you'll realize how fucking wrong you are someday.
You will somehow feel ashame for not appreciating everything.
I went through it, and the pain is still here until today.
My heart is still bleeding.
Everyday when I'm struggling, all I did was hiding myself under the blanket.
I wanted to scream, wanted to dodge and runaway from all these, I wanted to just die. 
Why, I don't deserve all these. I couldn't stand it. I'm tired.
Study, future,money,love,friendship,family.........

FML.
I'm tired of carrying all these alone.
Can I take a break?